Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
I hope mine doesn't look like that
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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