You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
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