dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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