Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
Randomize
