That's intense
She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Randomize
