dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
