Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Randomize
