So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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