Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
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