They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
