I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Randomize
