They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Randomize
