make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
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