No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
