College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize