how hairy? two words: wookie tits
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
