she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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