so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
