I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
