I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
She needs sedatives and a leash
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
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