dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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