38 yer olds are good kisserssss
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
