Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
