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Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
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