My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Randomize
