Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Randomize