so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
17 year olds will be the death of me.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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