Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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