forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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