I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
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