He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
pray to the hookup gods
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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