glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Randomize
