Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Randomize