Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
