you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
