it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Randomize
