hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Randomize
