Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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