Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Randomize
