Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
