just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
