She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
