he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
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