does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize