Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Randomize
