So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
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