Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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