Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Randomize
