So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Randomize
