The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
