I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
